Written on: October 20, 2017
by Elisa Coleclough
Resilience is basically the capacity to get back on your feet after “something” or “someone” has let you down. Recovering quickly is essential, to people and to companies. Let us focus on the people side. Being resilient spares you great emotional cost, not only to you but those around you too.
“Nothing in life is to be feared, it is only to be understood” Marie Curie
Here are some tips, that have helped me, hope you find them useful:
Difficulty is an opportunity to build character. In a recent book I read titled The Talent Lab, it mentions how hardship builds athletes’ minds and shapes the character traits that will make them outstanding. Basically the way, trouble is face defines subtle but strong whether between elite and a super elite athlete.
Be humble. In order to be a good winner, you need to be a good looser. That does not mean that you need to be content with bad results. On the contrary, when you have not been the winner every single time, you actually take time and analyze the reasons and see how what can be improved next time. Remember what Tiger Woods said about failing and wining: “My failures have made me look at myself in a way I’ve never wanted to before.” So not getting it right all the time, it is just a reminder that you need to look at yourself closely.
The only constant in life is change. You need to adapt to all life circumstances, and it is the ability to adapt and to learn fast that will make you sustainable competitive. So embrace change like a surf wave, hands on and work with your skills and abilities to bring out the best in every situation.
Be true to yourself. Accept the fact that life is not being happy all the time, actually most of the time, you will only feel peace, which is the balance of all your emotions. Seek for that balance in order to be able to deal with daily challenges in a constructive and calm way. Accept your emotions, even if they are “negative” (sadness, tiredness, etc.), because by letting them flow, you connect to yourself and see in which areas of your character you can still work.
Be the cause not the reaction. Remember that some changes need to be made, and more difficult changes are the ones we need to make to “ourselves”. They might be painful or embarrassing, but it is better to acknowledge them and work with them proactively. Not simply be like a boat drifting under a storm without any control.
Have hobbies or participate in community activities. Having activities that you like and you do for fun connects you to yourself, to others, helps you build confidence. If those activities imply being outdoors or going out of your comfort zone, it is event better. We are social beings and spending time with others not only relaxes us and reduces the stress, but also produces new neuronal connections, endorphin (well-being), dopamine (motivation) and serotonin (relaxation).
Focus on solutions. Shift your focus from the problem to the solution. All the great innovators, inventors and outside-the-box thinkers focus on the solutions that is why they are highly effective at finding new ways to solve things. The more we focus on solutions the more both brain hemispheres will be forced to interact and again new neural connections will be built. Also focusing on what you CAN do, actually helps us to apply mental and physical energy positively.
Be persistent. Remember when you were little and you had to learn to read or the numbers. Well, probably you don’t remember. We all did two things at that time: we were persistent (learning and repeating over and over) and there was no room for failing. So remember, you can, just need to be persistent.
These are only a few tips that will remind you on how to build resilience, one of the most powerful personal assets we all need to have. I leave you with one last phrase of one of my favorite movies:
“Why do we fall? So we can learn to pick ourselves up.” Alfred to Bruce Wayne (Batman Begins)
Please let me you tips and tricks for resilience in the box below. Have a great day/week. Eli